For the past month, I have taken a bit of a hiatus from writing. I’m proud to say that I did it for my marriage. I simply wanted to spend time focusing on my wife and kids.
Do you like how I did that? I totally passed my procrastination off as an admirable achievement. That is one of the perks of marriage- the “for my wife” procrastination and it’s the topic of today’s post.
Truth be told, I didn’t write much over the past month because I was busy, tired, bored, sick and caught up in the Christmas and New Year’s holiday madness. (You can translate that into “watching college football games” if you want.) Since I’m married, though, I can claim it as trying to spend more time with my wife. Having kids increases the effectiveness of the scam, but it’s just as useful – and cheaper in the long run – with just a wife.
The good side of this excuse is that it is next to impossible to disprove. After all, most couples only spend an average of 3 minutes a day with their focus solely on each other. In fact, those moments are so rare that many spouses fail to even notice they happened. All I have to do is remind my wife of one of those instances when we were alone together without distraction and I’ve probably made my point. And your spouse is the only one you have to convince. Outsiders are left wondering how you were able to focus your time on your wife and kids.
So men, if you’ve been looking for the perks of marriage, this is one of them. (Yeah, I realize that may be depressing to some of you but you will come to appreciate it around year 10.) Unmarried men can’t use this excuse. They are stuck having to fake illness or amnesia to explain their procrastination.
But seriously: The three-minutes stat was not exactly scientific, but the idea is unfortunately too true. How much time have you spent with your spouse without distractions this week? Brushing your teeth while she showers is not usually quality time spent together. Sending each other messages on Facebook or Twitter doesn’t count either. Plan some time today to give your wife your full attention. Wives, this can work for you too. Give your spouse what they really want – you.
What about you? How do you ensure that you and your spouse spend quality time together? What constitutes quality time in your opinion?